About Dr. Monica Mansilla
My name is
I’m a Registered Social Worker and I hold a Ph.D. in Existential, Humanistic, and Transpersonal Psychology, providing psychotherapy in downtown Toronto. In addition to offering private therapy, I worked for 17 years as a therapist and an academic, first at the University of Waterloo, and after at the University of Calgary.
My experience includes working with adults looking for help in an array of issues, including:
Relationships
Couple issues
Single life and Loneliness
Divorce
Sex, pleasure, and connection
Healing from breakups and designing outstanding relationships
Depression and Anxiety
Loneliness
Search for meaning
Self-love
Sleep issues
Full-life transformation and authentic living
Embracing abundance
I look forward to meeting you.
“It is in the space of child-like presence and creativity that we
show the full expression of our authentic self.” — Mónica Mansilla
In my journey as a therapist,
my curiosity about best practices brought me to discover that in research, Mindfulness-Based approaches proved to be the most effective in Counselling and Psychotherapy. Over my 20 years as a therapist I have specialised in the integration of mindfulness-based approaches into my practice and combined it with other therapeutic approaches, that proved leading edge. Approaches such as Imago, EMDR, and embodiment therapy. Further, and I designed a Mindfulness-Based approach to Existential Therapy MBExist, and a Humanistic-Existential and Mindfulness integrative approach to relationship therapy The Heart Approach. This approach is where I practice from primarily.
I have a Ph.D. in Existential, Humanistic and Transpersonal Psychology. This is not a clinical Psychology Degree, but a Psychotherapy Doctorate. However, I also hold a Master’s Degree in Social Work (MSW., RSW), that my clients can use for insurance claims.
I believe that as a therapist I must always remain current and specialized in the approaches for best practice. I have completed advanced certifications in Existential-Humanistic Therapy (EHT), Imago Couple Therapy, Eye Movement, Desensitisation & Reprocessing (EMDR), Narrative Psychotherapy, Cognitive Behavioural Therapy (CBT), Mindfulness-Based Cognitive Therapy (MBCT), Emotion Focused Therapy (EFT), Internal Family Systems (IFS) and EMDR.
I am a registered member of the Ontario College of Social Workers and Social Service Workers (OCSWSSW) and of the Society of Humanistic Psychology, Division 32 of the American Psychological Association. I also hold complete certification as an Imago therapist and workshop presenter, and as a Mindfulness-Based Cognitive Therapy group leader.
I specialize in working with adults and couples in a wide range of presenting concerns. However, in my practice, I found that the base of pain and suffering for most adults are fear, depression, loneliness, and disconnection. These might present in such minor ways that we don’t even identify it, and we might even call it many other things such as “insecurity, fear, procrastination, stress, disinterest, relationship issues, sleep disorders, anger, addictions, unhappiness, emptiness, and others” All of these are (even if at a minimum) debilitating states of fear and emptiness.
My Story
"When we feel safe, free, connected, and worthy we heal. Our authentic self is the expression of playfulness, courage, and compassion that shows up in the absence of fear."
~ Monica Mansilla
Please join me in a brief life story that will give you a take of who I am and all about my practice… From here you can always drop me a line and ask me more. I began my career as a therapist quite young.
It’s been 25 years since I joined my first Psychology degree, and it’s been 20 years since I started practicing as a Psychotherapist. I have been blessed to never regret dedicating my life to this journey. Nonetheless, several times I let-go-of ways in which I practice, and instead, I embraced new theories and practices that in the years and decades changed as I also changed in my understanding of life and the world.
Separating myself from my professional life has always proven a challenge for me. That is, until I realised that there is no separation since in being authentic with my work, I had to embody it and be one with it both personally and professionally.
My initial Psychology training… started in 1995, completing my first psychology degree in 1999. From the moment I started university, I knew that I wanted to be a psychotherapist. My journey continued when I received my first clinical licence as a Registered Social Worker in 2003. I immediately started working as a counsellor and I immersed myself in advanced trainings in Mindfulness and psychotherapy.
When I discovered mindfulness, I realised I had found my Niche!
Further becoming a Mindfulness-Based Cognitive Therapy MBCT and a Mindfulness-Based Stress Reduction MBSR group leader.
The rest was an enjoyable and challenging hike uphill while completing my Ph.D. in Existential-Humanistic and Transpersonal Psychology.
I soon realised that An Existential-Humanistic and Transpersonal Psychology Ph.D. was the best theoretical and embodiment training to use mindfulness practices a the core of my work with clients in their journey of healing and growth.
My passion for mindfulness grew as I began conducting research and continued to be astonished of the dramatic transformation and healing within the participants in groups that I was running.
As a result, while immersed in Ph.D. studies, I proposed an Existential-Humanistic approach to the mindfulness groups that I was running, and I named it MBExist. The transition was extremely easy, given that Existential, Humanistic and Transpersonal theories were, to me, the real Psychology home of mindfulness practices.
Being a psychotherapist for almost 20 years has been a humbling process. I learned that life is richer, more beautiful, and definitely harder than I could have ever imagined. A lesson I learned through the added dimension, was knowing the life of others, brings into the knowing and the experience of my own life. Having the honour of witnessing human experiences through the pain and joy of my clients, also taught me that…
“The ultimate healing power I hold as a psychotherapist and as a counsellor, is the power of the authenticity, compassion, and presence I hold in my relationships with my clients. I learned, that travelling the journey of healing with my clients is a privilege, an honour, and a great responsibility that I wish to never take lightly.”
~ Monica Mansilla
Individual or couple therapy?
In my 20’s, I worked primarily with trauma survivors and relied on mindfulness, Narrative Psychotherapy, CBT, and EMDR as best practices to bring people out of the abysm of trauma. However, my personal life was about to impact my practice. The context of romantic love and relationships began to take priority, as in my late 20’s my life chaos rotated around my deep desire to establish a committed partnership and build a family. Being a therapist and being single, I soon realised that there wasn’t much information about romantic love when it came to single people. All the information was mainly for the purpose of couple therapy.
A rather traumatic event turned into growth, given that by the time I was 25, I had completed a master’s thesis studying Adult Romantic Attachment. Yet almost a decade after, the topic was surfacing again in my life, and there were not many places where I could find information. Not unless I was already in a relationship. Too much to be said for my obsession with romantic love, 5 years after and already in my mid-thirties, I found myself ending a relationship with the man I imagined I would spend the rest of my life with, and again I was at a loss.
My encounter with Imago happened in my attempt to re-embrace single life. I joined an Imago workshop for individuals. I thought “Finally, I found a practice that cared about singles!” Immediately after finishing the workshop as a participant, I decided to join training and become the difference I was looking for. This time I could work with singles in the context of romantic love. Soon enough, I realised that in order to become an expert in the romantic journey of a single person. I first had to become a couple’s therapist. The last thing I ever wanted to do. Yet I did it!
With Imago I found a second home for my practice. Working with couples was the most rewarding practice I could embrace, to the point that I went ahead and proposed Theheartapproach as an integrative couple therapy approach, mainly based on Existential-Humanistic therapy, Imago, and Mindfulness, while bringing the nuances of other relationship approaches such as EFT, The Gottman approach, and PACT.
“Yet, even after a Ph.D. in romantic love and relationships and practising as a mindfulness leader, little did I know about the deepest and most meaningful relationship of a lifetime. The intricate and life-giving relationship between the I and the Self.” ~ Monica Mansilla
As many people do, I turned into my career. Becoming a relationship expert served me well as I tried to turn away from my personal experience of loneliness. I left little or no energy for my personal life and for walking my talk. Teaching, counselling, and building relationships where I could be of service to others was easier than experiencing pain. Yet, I neglected the relationship I was ultimately responsible for. The one with myself!
As expected, years of neglecting myself and over focusing on work and on others led to heightened experiences of loss, including the end of my marriage. Highly recognised as a therapist practicing and teaching internationally. I experienced an almost perfect track record when it came to healing practices in couple therapy. I completed a Ph.D. in romantic love and relationships and proposed the heart approach, which I was teaching to therapists across 4 continents. Yet, I was marked by the ending of yet another significant relationship and the only anchor to sail through years of grief and loss, was my mindfulness practice.
“Now I can say I walk my talk day-in and out. The losses, the trauma, the hurts, and injuries that I witness in my practice with clients as much as the ones that I have experienced in my life… they all now have a different meaning.”~ Monica Mansilla
I live and practice under a mindfulness integrative frame, where I value and celebrate the theories, such as Imago, HEART, and MBExist. Theories that work beautifully over and over again. I chose psychotherapy-practices that address human possibilities and limitations and are not limited by the understanding of humanity as a simple equation of thoughts, emotions, and behaviours. My practice is grounded on research-based and human-centered approaches. I believe in the beauty of the perfectly imperfection. I practice in curious awareness of the unique existence of each human being, where no two people are the same, yet we all share more alikeness that we do differences.
I spent the last 10 years of my life developing an international career and bringing MBExist and Theheartapproach to therapists and clients in the Middle East, Europe, and Australasia.
Now home again in Toronto! I hope to bring back MBExist and Theheartapproach to the community where my career and my adult life were born. This time focusing my passion and calling into bringing firs, myself and then others, into the foundational experience of love and connection. The only we can only experience when we first embrace the loving and tender relationship between the "I" and the "Self".
Being a Registered Social Worker and a Doctor in Psychology is my training. Yet, working with clients is an honour that I enjoyed for 2 decades already and that I plan on embracing for the next 4 decades to come.
